Step to the left
by Earth
Summary: Jounouchi is in love with Yami. Yami is quite happy with Seto. In order to prevent Jououchi demise at the hands of the CEO, the group decides it's their mission to find jounouchi a new flame, or die trying. SYY and others.
1. In which Seto and Yami are reunited

Prideshipping and fluff ahead.

Disclaimer: No own, no profit, no sue.

Kaiba Seto was not happy. Of course, it could be argued that Kaiba is never happy , so in that case, let us be safe and say that Seto Kaiba was very thoroughly pissed off. The object of his anger: one Jounouchi Katsuya, as usual. Because Jounouchi Katsuya had just done something that Seto could not forgive.

He had pulled out Yami no Yuugi's chair for him. And now, he was currently leaning over said ex-pharaoh's shoulder discussing opening tactics as the pharaoh prepared to ground Otogi into the dirt in an impromptu Magic and Wizards duel.

Seto ground his teeth and notched his glare of doom up a little. It was now bordering on the -I'm-going-to-rip-your-throat-out level, not that Jounouchi noticed.

Slender hands clenched around his paperback as Jounouchi casually clasped his hand over Yami's shoulder, congratulating him on wiping out a large portion of Otogi's life points.

Get your hand off him, mutt!

But the hand stayed….and stayed….and stayed…and when it became clear the Jounouchi had no intention of removing his hand anytime soon, Seto decided that he had had enough.

You see, right about the same time that Yami got his memories back, Seto nearly drove himself off the highway when he suddenly found himself remembering things he was sure he had never done in this life. Like wielding shadow magic. Or riding a camel.

Or making passionate love to one Pharaoh Atemu.

So after hightailing it back to Japan, and one extremely awkward conversation later, he and said Pharaoh had decided to put any future "activities" on hold, Yami needing time to get used to having a physical body in this modern world and Seto really not having the time to start a relationship, especially with someone who was still freaked out by a microwave. However, it was also an unspoken agreement that, when the time was right, the two would continue where they had left off three thousand years ago.

Seto growled as he stalked towards the small group. He was just going to have to remind Yami of that.

* * *

Seto leaned against the fence on the school rooftop, arms crossed, brooding scowl fixed firmly in place. To anyone else the demeanour would be off putting, for the CEO of Kaiba Corp did look quite intimidating, except to those who knew him, and knew that this was perfectly normal Seto behaviour.

Lunch had not gone well. His interruption of the duel had caused Jounouchi and he to get into an argument, with Seto being quite vicious, (he blamed it on the fact that Jounouchi still kept his hand on Yami throughout the entire thing) and after he had thoroughly verbally cut Jounouchi to pieces Yami had had the gall to fix the CEO with a cold stare, reaching up to pat Jounouchi's hand comfortingly, telling the blonde not to let Seto get him down, that Jounouchi had friends no matter what. At which point the blonde had hugged the former pharaoh enthusiastically and Seto had to leave before he burst a blood vessel or reached over and killed Jounouchi, which he very much wanted to do, or both.

Seto's hands clenched. Where was one of those stress balls that Mokuba always bought him?

Oh yes, he had thrown the last one at Jounouchi's head last week, right after the blonde had reached up and gotten a library book from the top shelf for Yami, and then brushed hands with the former pharaoh for a little bit too long afterward.

Seto smirked, it had been pretty funny to see the confused expressions as the blue sponge ball came flying out of no where.

"Is there something you wanted?"

Seto turned his scowl in the direction of the doorway back down to the school. Yami stood there, looking perfectly smug. Just like he always did.

"What. Was. That?"

Yami looked confused for a second, "I said-"

"I heard what you said!" Seto exploded, "I meant what happened to day at lunch. What was with the little stunt with Jounouchi?"

"Stunt with Jounouchi?" Yami looked bewildered for once, "Seto, what are you talking about?"

"The whole chair-pulling-out-thing, the fact that he had his hand on you for practically the entire time! And then the whole 'Jounouchi and I are friends no matter what' thing!"

"Jounouchi and I _are_ friends."

Seto practically snarled, "oh please, you're not that dense, everyone can see that Jounouchi wants to be more than friends with you."

A small smile appeared on Yami's lips, "perhaps."

Seto did snarl then, grabbing Yami and lifting him to sit on one of the large maintenance boxes that dotted the roof, so that they were eye to eye.

"You belong to me."

Yami's eyes hardened and Seto prepared himself for another 'I am not a piece of meat' lecture. However, instead, the small hands fisted themselves in Seto's jacket,

"Then stop taking your sweet ass time and claim me," Yami hissed before pulling Seto into a fierce kiss.

Well, this was unexpected, was all Seto's mind could come up with before his body told it firmly to shut up and enjoy the moment. Which Seto proceeded to do, thoroughly.

"Mou Hitori No Boku?" came Yuugi's voice from the stairwell, "are you up here?"

They broke the kiss, both breathing heavily.

"Hey, Yami!" came Jounouchi's voice. "We're going to the arcade! I want to show you that new game! We can go one on one!"

Seto swore.

Yami smirked and slid off the box, straightening his jacket.

"Mou Hitori No Boku?"

"Coming, Aibou!" Yami called, stooping down to collect his school briefcase. Straightening, he stood on tip toes to give Seto a chaste kiss on the cheek. "Think about what I said," he murmured into the brunette's ear. He stood back and began to smooth the creases he had caused out of Seto's jacket. "After all, you wouldn't want someone else to beat you would you? Especially not Jounouchi-kun," and with 'smug smirk number 64', the, I'm-right-and-you-know-it one, he vanished back into the school.

* * *

That night found Seto staring blankly at his computer screen. He was supposed to be working. He had just bought out a smaller company, ergo, he had a shitload of paperwork and whatnot to get through.

So why was he on his sixteenth consecutive game of computer solitaire?

Because he couldn't focus, couldn't get thoughts of certain crimson eyed someone out of his head.

Dimly, Seto wondered if it was possible to turn Solitaire into a competitive sport. Maybe he could launch a holographic version of solitaire….if the cards were thirty feet tall, would it make it more interesting to kids?

Maybe if the cards blew up, or destroyed something when you played them….

Then stop taking your sweet ass time and claim me…

Oh god, would he ever..

Seto groaned and forcibly pulled his thoughts out of happy Yami hentai land. Mokuba was already starting to look at him weird ever since he came out of his third cold shower of the night.

….Battle Solitaire?…..Deluxe Duel Solitaire?…Please god, I need a backup for when interest in Magic and Wizards starts to fade Solitaire?….

After all, you wouldn't want someone else to beat you would you?

Never. Never in a million years. He tie Yami up and lock him in a closet before he'd let him…

Mmm….tie Yami up…..

It was getting increasingly harder to pull away from his happy thoughts.

…Especially not Jounouchi-kun…

…We can go one on one!…

Suddenly, happy Seto and Yami thoughts were abruptly rudely replaced by less than happy Jounouchi and Yami thoughts.

That's it! Seto's resolved hardened. Screw the fact that Seto had so much work that keeping a relationship alive would be practically impossible. Screw the fact that Yami still didn't know how to properly used a touch tone phone….or that he sometimes forgot that he had to eat now in order to stay alive…

He'd be damned if he was going to let Jounouchi walk off with what rightfully belonged to him.

And screw Yami's "I am not a piece of property" speeches, he was going to get the Kaiba Corp logo tattooed onto the Pharaoh's ass.

Or maybe a Blue-Eyes-White Dragon? A small one, right at the base of his spine…

Smiling dreamily, Seto let himself drift off back into Happy Yami Hentai Land.

* * *

Sighing, and thankful that another day of school was over, Yami carelessly shoved his math textbook into his locker. Not like he cared, he detested the subject. Honestly, who came up with the number zero anyway? And why did he have to lean the quadratic equations of triangles? Come to think of it, why did he go to school anyway? He was pharaoh, child of the gods, brimming with enough shadow magic to destroy the world in various ways several times over. Why sit here and listen to mindless mortals drone on when he had already completed his education back in Egypt…

Because Yuugi's grandfather had insisted, that's why.

And, all powerful pharaoh he might be, he was terrified of the man. Sugoroku just reminded him too much of his old teacher and caretaker, Shimon.

Grumbling at the injustice of short terrifying old men, Yami slammed his locker closed, only to find Seto standing there with a sort of creepy smile on his face.

"Hello Atemu," the CEO said silkily.

Yami's guard immediately went up. He eyed Seto suspiciously, people only called him by his real name when they wanted something. Yuugi-tachi were notorious for doing it when they wanted Yami to do something that involved using shadow magic in anyway. Sugoroku used it when the former pharaoh was in trouble.

"Seth," Yami replied coolly. Two could play at this game. He pulled on his jacket.

"Where are you going?" Seto asked, still in the same tone. The maniacal gleam in his eyes was brighter than usual.

"To the arcade, with aibou and everyone else. Jounouchi wants a rematch."

As predicted, the CEO's eyes darkened at the mention of the blonde's name. "Hmmm, well, I'm afraid there has been a slight change to your plans…"

"What are you talking about?"

"Here, let me get that for you." Seto moved forward to grab Yami's school briefcase, and the next thing the shorter boy knew, he was slung over the CEO's shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

Of course, potatoes don't squirm or protest nearly as much.

* * *

"Where is he, Yuugi?" Anzu asked, jumping from foot to foot impatiently. "I thought he said he'd meet us here."

"He did." said Yuugi, slowly, "I don't know what's keeping him."

"Don't worry Anzu," said Jounouchi, "He'd never stand me, I mean us, up."

Aibou?

/Mou Hitori No Boku! Where are you? We're all waiting!/

I don't think I'll be able to come after all. I've been….delayed.

/Huh? Where are you?/

um….

/Mou Hitori No Boku, where are you this exact instant!/

….Kaiba's shoulder….

/……./

You asked.

/I….see….well, I'll see you tomorrow than, shall I? Have fun.

Eyes coming back into focus, Yuugi turned to his friends, grinning sheepishly, "Um, mou hitori no boku won't be coming after all. He's been…..delayed…."

Jounouchi swore.

* * *

Wincing slightly as he was unceremoniously dumped into the back seat of the limo, Yami glared at Seto as the brunette made himself comfortable on the padded leather seats.

"What have I told you about-"

"You're not property or meat or a share of stock that I can purchase, I know, I know." Seto pulled Yami onto his lap, arms looping loosely around the former pharaoh's slender waist. Smirking wickedly, he leaned forward to whisper into the other boy's ear, "but that's not going to stop me from taking what's mine."

"Jerk," Yami said halfheartedly.

Several hours later Seto collapsed onto the silken sheets of his bed, utterly exhausted. Beside him, Yami made a contented noise, rolling over onto his stomach, resting his head on his folded arms. One crimson opened to regard his lover.

"Are you all right?" Seto asked softly.

Yami smiled, "I'm fine, you may have to carry me down that giant staircase of yours tomorrow though."

Seto allowed himself a small smirk, "I carried you up it, I guess I can carry you down."

Yami 'hmmmed,' eyes closing as Seto stroked his back softly. After a few moments the brunette spoke again,

"What about Jounouchi?"

"Jounouchi? What about him?"

"You know, his crush on you…you're going to tell him to back off right?"

"I don't need to. He doesn't have a crush on me."

Seto's eyes widened, "what? But I thought…I mean he…"

"I asked him to."

"What?!"

Yami smiled and stroked Seto's cheek fondly. "3000 years is along time to be celibate, Seto-koi. I decided I needed help getting you motivated."

Seto let out a long suffering sigh, "You live to torment me. Don't you?"

"But of course."

There was silence, then,

"I still think he wants you."

More silence.

"Tell me, Atemu dearest, what do you think of tattoos?"


	2. In which the plan is formed

(insert standard disclaimer here)

Jounouchi! Hey Jounouchi!"

Jounouchi turned from where he had been slouching against the wall, hands stuffed in his pockets and angry glare fixed at the world, to see Yuugi running up to him, breathless.

"Phew, I'm glad I caught you. You want to grab something to eat?" Yuugi asked as he grabbed the blondes arm and proceeded to drag him along.

"Hn." Jounouchi said.

"Or maybe we could go see that new horror movie? Ringu?"

"Hn."

"Or we could just go back to the shop."

"Hn."

"Or we could shave our bodies completely bald, set ourselves on fire and make sweet sweet love throughout the night, you know, whatever you feel like doing."

"Hn."

"Jounouchi. What's wrong with you? You haven't listened to a word I've said."

"Hn."

"Jounouchi!" Yuugi yelled, stamping hard on the boy's foot. "Snap out of it!"

"Ow! What was that for?"

"Gasp! It speaks with more than monosyllables!"

"Shut up Yuugi," Jounouchi said, reaching out to ruffle the other's hair affectionately.

"Seriously Jounouchi," Yuugi said, reaching up to extract the bond's hand from his hair. "What's up?"

Jounouchi sighed and looked out towards the street, where, as fate would have it, a certain black limo, proudly bearing the initials KC, decided to drive by. The blonde's scowl deepened.

"You have three guesses and the first two don't count."

Yuugi followed his gaze to the rapidly departing limo. "Is this about Mou Hitori No Boku and Kaiba-kun?"

"Give the kid a prize."

"But Jounouchi, you knew. You even offered to help Mou Hitori No Boku and Kaiba to get back together."

"Hn.."

"Unless….Jounouchi, you didn't, you didn't use that as an excuse to get closer to my yami did you?"

"….maybe…"

Yuugi sighed, "Jounouchi, you idiot."

"I know. I just thought…you know…maybe if he spent time with me, he'd realize how much I like him, and what a great guy I am…and forget Kaiba."

"Jounouchi- have you been reading shoujo manga again?"

"What? No-"

"Oh I know! You've been watching that new teen drama haven't you?"

"Not helping, Yuugi."

"Hey, I think I saw that episode. The one where Kenji agrees to help Sakura attract the notice of the jock Watanuki, even though he's in love with her? Only at the end of the episode she realizes how much of a jerk Watanuki is and how nice Kenji is and agrees to go with him to the dance instead?"

"NOT HELPING, Yuugi!"

"Hmm…sorry Jouncouhi, but I don't think my yami is a bit like Sakura. In fact, I think he'd be pretty pissed off if he found out you were comparing them."

"YUUGI!"

* * *

Yami sighed and crumpled up the newspaper ad clipping that had been slipped into the pages of his History text. This was what? The seventh? Twenty seventh? All of them advertising tattoo parlours.

He had to give points to Seto for determination.

But he still wasn't going to get a tattoo. Which he had told Seto quite firmly the other night. If Seto wanted him to get a tattoo of the Blue Eyes White Dragon, then he had every right to make Seto get a tattoo of the Black Magician. Whereupon Seto had said that he'd be shot dead before he'd tattoo Mahaado onto any portion of his anatomy. Yami had thought that that was the end of the matter, until the add clippings had started showing up, slipped in side his texts, deposited into his coat and pants pockets, even a full page ad, which proudly proclaimed that they specialized in Magic and Wizard's designs, (which Seto had circled in red marker, as though Yami could possibly not notice the three inch neon-green type) taped to the inside of his locker. Seto had even clipped a picture of the Blue Eyes to the ad. Yami had retaliated by taping the same ad, this time with stars drawn around the bright red circle, back in the CEO's locker, but with a picture of his Magician instead of the Dragon.

His locker had been left alone after that. Now If only the same could be said about everything else he owned.

* * *

"The way I see it, we have two options," Anzu declared that night, the group had gathered at Yuugi's house, minus Yami, who was currently "slumber partying" at Seto's, and Jounouchi, who was sulking at home, to discuss the Jounouchi situation. "We can either try to get Yami away from Kaiba and closer to Jounouchi. Or we can find someone new for Jounouchi."

"Or we can just leave them all the hell alone," said Malik, who was promptly ignored.

"I say we go with the second option," said Honda. "The one without Kaiba involved."

"Why?" Otogi, teased, "afraid of him are we?"

"Damn straight."

"I second Honda's motion," Yuugi said, "Besides, I don't think we could pull apart my Yami and Kaiba even if we wanted to. Something tells me that after 3000 years, it's going to take a lot more than we've got to rip them apart. And furthermore, I don't want to do anything that will upset Mou Hitori No Boku's happiness."

"Besides," Ryou spoke up, "Kaiba is scary enough as it is. Imagine what he would be like if he found out we were trying to steal his boyfriend away? I third the motion."

"Very well," Anzu said, "all those in favour of trying to find Jououchi a new flame say Ay."

""Ay!""

"I still say we just leave them all alone," Malik grumped.


End file.
